5 Safe Places For Titas To Hangout This Sinulog

Sinulog season is upon us and with that comes parties and festivities.

Newsflash: we titas just can't deal with these crazy events anymore. Yes, we're not ashamed to say that the party phase has left the building.

Save it for kids who wish to get sh*tfaced and fill their Instagram stories with festive poster paint, beer, and sweat. We titas, on the other hand, will just have to seek sanctuary in places far, far away from the partying and reminisce about ye olde prititit! days.

Here are 5 safe places for titas to hangout in this Sinulog:

1. Home

You don't have to go far, beshie.

Home is still where it's happening: you got food from the groceries you did last payday, internet that you paid for and a Netflix subscription that's ready to be used and abused.

Who needs to be with party animals when you've got the wonders of indoor plumbing and home cooking?

The best part is you don't even have to pay for any of these things. Anti-social you might be, but having spent the last 5 Sinulog partying out can take its toll on someone, too, you know? You deserve a nice break away from society. If you want to stay at home...do it!

2. Somewhere without parties

We're not even kidding: parties are great...until you're old enough to realize that that amount of alcohol will probably send your liver into a coma.

Or that being sticky from a beer shower and surrounded by sweaty bodies isn't totally fun (it's actually gross).

Or that you can actually have fun without having to wash out various poster paint colors (and other suspicious fluids) from your hair the next day.

So, yes, we're skipping the parties this year. Other types of religious and cultural celebrations such as the novena processions or the Mardi Gras are still very much in our calendar...but after all that, you can find us somewhere clear of the parties. How does a nice secluded cafe sound?

3. Somewhere without "children"

We titas really like our peace and quiet, so children (read: college kids) who brandish selfie sticks and go around the city in cut-up clothes are something we'd like to avoid. Best hideouts are anywhere outside the city proper. Avoid Cebu Business Park at all cost. A lot of parties have also been moved to SRP or North Reclamation area, so you can't be safe there, either.

Where, then, is the best place to hold court?

Probably somewhere beyond the limits of these kids' weekly allowance...although we can't be too sure, because kids these days are loaded (have you seen their venti frappes, tita?!)

If you and your fellow titas can afford it, perhaps you can book an AirBnb in the outskirts of town. A trip to an underrated ramen house in Lapu-Lapu? Even better. You gotta be creative in avoiding these kids. They're everywhere! Just like how you used to be when you were younger. #NowYouKnow

4. Somewhere with tea, wine or both

Ah, isn't it nice to kick back and actually drink--- and not bathe in--- your beverage of choice?

Tea with a nice little slice of red velvet cake is really quite comforting.

Is that Nora Jones on the background? Yup, it definitely is. Is that the unmistakable smell of lavender aromatherapy candles wafting in the air? Right-o. And wow---is that the latest Colleen Hoover romance on the table? Why yes, did you expect anything less?

If you want to kick back and relax, all you have to do is put a kettle on. I personally love Dilmah's Italian Almond tea. It's so aromatic and it's well under Php40. I pair it with some cakes from Leona Cakes and Pastries.

 Or if you're feeling fancy,  wine, cheese and deli would do mighty fine as well. Take inspiration from the quintessential French tambayan ng bayan, La Vie Parisienne and have a nice night of wine at home.

And when everyone's settled in, let's have a nice conversation about our SSS contributions and our health insurance policies, yeah?

5. A place where you can find beautiful, kind-hearted, socially aware, financially independent men to strike a conversation with

We wish finding said guy was easy as pie. We wish finding a place to find said guy was easy as pie! The truth of the matter is, that one perfect place or dude might not even exist. It's a tough process, but who knows? A girl can dream.

A perfect romantic backdrop would be Circa 1900.

I just fell in love with the old colonial houses because they're so lovingly preserved. It's shufa and classy, too. Who knows, you might just find the guy of your tita dreams there.

Just make sure to ask for an NBI clearance from him though, just to be sure he's not an ax murderer or a member of the budol-budol gang. Uso scam basta Sinulog. :)

Wild Sinulog Party? No Thanks

Whether or not you identify as a tita, there's really no shame in wanting to stay in instead of partying during Sinulog. You've probably done your time at Baseline or you simply have no interest in parties.

Whatever your reason, it's perfectly okay to take a break, and to take it slow.

Celebrate Sinulog the way you know: by kicking back, being mindful and just spending quality time with people who matter. You don't have to sport poster paint in your hair or wear tattered clothes...although there's really no problem if you like that kind of thing, either.

Have a wonderful Sinulog celebration, everyone! Pit Senor! :)


K x

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