The past week has left me in a serious funk over some fictional boyfriends. I can't seem to shake them off (even if I really want to). So, in true effort to move on with my adult life, I've come up with a list of the best book boyfriends I've had the unfortunate luck to encounter thus far.
I hope you like them, because I sure did. It's really too bad they only exist in book pages. :)
1. Nikolai Lantsov from The Grisha Trilogy by Leigh Bardugo
Nicknames: Sobachka, Sturmhond
Claim to Fame: Pirate, prince, gunsmith, damnably handsome and smart as a whip. There is no doubt in this world that Nikolai Lantsov has the most impressive resume out of all the guys in our list.
Why he's the best boyfriend: He is shrewd, but kindhearted. Just imagine, whether you're stranded in a desert island or held captive by a bunch of evil rebels, you're sure to survive with this charming badass because he can either shoot them all between the eyes or charm them to death. And goodness, he is a prince! Who doesn't want a prince who loves grand gestures? He is the stuff of all your sarcastic, adrenaline-filled daydreams.
Best pickup line: “I'm used to being the center of attention wherever I go. I've been told I could charm the shoes off a racehorse midstride, and yet you seem impervious.”
2. Peter Kavinsky from To All The Boys I've Loved Before by Jenny Han
Nicknames: Peter K
Claim to Fame: Sugared donuts and shiny black Audi
Why he's the best book boyfriend: Oh Peter, you had us with your sugared donuts and your shameful knowledge of Harry Potter trivia. You can thank Jenny Han for her cocky-charming boys. Peter seems like a shallow, cool jock at first but beneath his cool-guy rep, Peter K is endearing, sweet and sincere.
Best pickup line: "You only like guys you don't have a chance with, because you're scared."
3. Dean Robillard from Natural Born Charmer by Susan Elizabeth Philipps
Claim to Fame: NFL superstar with an ex-addict mom and a rockstar dad meets a headless beaver and falls in love. It can't get any weirder, funnier and more romantic than that.
Why he's the best book boyfriend: Dean is loaded, has a great sports career and cocky as can be. He is a pain in the ass most of the time but if you enjoy smart-ass bickering to express your feelings for each other, then Dean is the perfect book boyfriend for you.
Best pickup line: "I waited a long time to fall in love. Why it had to be you, I don't know, God's big joke, I guess."
4. Park Sheridan from Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell
Claim to Fame: Late 80's soundtracks and school bus love affairs, anyone?
Why he's the best book boyfriend: Ah, Park Sheridan. Lover of curvy redheads with major family issues everywhere. Park is Asian. Park is different. Park will throw a roundhouse kick to the temple to anyone who dares to besmirch your honor, even if you're a moody teenager who unknowingly hurts him from time to time. Park will never leave you, even if your love was kind of doomed from the beginning. Plus, he's from the 80s so, if you break up, he probs won't do it through Facebook.
Best pickup line: "You’re the smartest girl I’ve ever met, and the funniest, and everything you do surprises me. And I wish I could say that those are the reasons I like you, because that would make me sound like a really evolved human being …‘But I think it’s got as much to do with your hair being red and your hands being soft … and the fact that you smell like homemade birthday cake”
5. Etienne St. Clair from Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins
Claim to Fame: Born in LA, raised in England, goes to school in France. Do you even have to wonder why St. Clair is loved by girls from all ages the world over?
Why he's the best book boyfriend: St. Clair is the bestfriend who you want to be your boyfriend. He is fun and thoughtful and artsy and would go the extra mile to make you feel special. Best case scenario: you end up with a happily ever after with someone who's soul was made after yours. Worst case scenario: you'll probably find yourself in the deepest depths of The Friendzone for life. Because it's a bit futile to try to get over St. Clair.
Best pickup line: “Welcome to Paris, Anna. I'm glad you've come.”
6. Ronan Lynch from The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater
Claim to Fame: He could literally be the man of your dreams. See what I did there? :)
Why he's the best book boyfriend: Ronan is...abrasive at his best. And he probably likes guys. But all through out the Raven Cycle (which is an awesome series) you can find that there is no task too big for this guy when it comes to protecting the ones he love. He is steadfast and loyal even if he swears a lot. So yes, Ronan Lynch is on this list.
(Not the) Best Pickup line: “I am being perfectly fucking civil.”
7. Dash from Dash and Lily's Book of Dares by David Levithan and Rachel Cohn
Claim to Fame: A red moleskine notebook filled with adventures stuck in some aisle on the Strand. Exciting, right?
Why he's the best book boyfriend: Dash can be described as a snarky hipster who loves words and yogurt too much for his own good. He is smart and classy. A bit weird and aloof for a teenage boy but that's just one of his endearing qualities. Dash is honest and is a loyal friend. And he's awfully smart. And Dash? How cool of a name is that?
Best pickup line: “You think fairy tales are only for girls? Here's a hint - ask yourself who wrote them. I assure you, it wasn't just the women. It's the great male fantasy - all it takes is one dance to know that she's the one"
8 . Leo Valdez from The Heroes of Olympus Series by Rick Riordan
Claim to Fame: His plan to save the world revolves around another plan to save the girl from her impossible-to-locate island prison.
Why he's the best book boyfriend: Sorry Percy Jackson, but Leo takes your cake on this list. Leo is so underrated, with some self esteem issues. But he is very talented and funny and would literally come back from the dead just to rescue you. That's gotta be something.
Best pickup line: “I'm the Super-sized McShizzle, man!" Leo said. "I'm Leo Valdez, bad boy supreme. And the ladies love a bad boy.”
9. Westley from The Princess Bride by William Goldman
Claim to Fame: He's from a classic tale of True Love and High Adventure. Isn't that enough?
Why he's the best book boyfriend: From Farm Boy to Lover to Pirate to Lover again, Westley is just one classic book boyfriend hero: ready to go to your rescue, willing to scale walls and fight evil princes to the death. Because of course, we saved the best for last didn't we? The Princess Bride is one of the funniest books ever written and I think it's so underrated in this generation. This should be required reading for everyone.
Best pickup line: “Do I love you? My God, if your love were a grain of sand, mine would be a universe of beaches."
10. Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
Claim to Fame: Like, duh?
Why he's the best book boyfriend: Let's get this straight. Fitzwilliam Darcy probably set the standards of being the perfect secretly-crazy-in-love-with-you boyfriend out there. In the history of the universe itself. Written some hundred years ago, his inherent charm and bossy attitude and secretly kind heart still makes girls swoon. I don't even have to write a reason why he's the best book boyfriend out there. This man's on top of the list. Dang, he's the reason for this list.
Best pickup line: "If, however, your feelings have changed, I would have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love... I love... I love you. And I never wish to be parted from you from this day on."
Pretty sure there should be more than 10 on this list, but we'll save all the others for later. Don't get mad at me for not including everyone's favorite Draco Malfoy or Peeta Mellark or (ick) Christian Grey. You know them too well already so I figured why not give the slots to all the underrated ones. And I do not like Christian Grey. Or Edward Cullen. Sorry friends.
Well, tell me who else I missed!
Keep reading!
K x
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